I love this, Peta! As a woman born in the late 1950s when the great majority of women on TV were portrayed as homemakers, and then having had three babies from 1988-1991 and being a stay at home mom, I have seen many shifts in how motherhood, fatherhood, and “providers“ are perceived, and unfortunately criticized. When I was a little girl, many stay-at-home moms were selling Avon, Tupperware, and Mary Kay cosmetics to earn income through having at-home get-togethers. The only difference I see from that to today, is that with the advancement of technology and social media, we have no idea what business is going to take off and grow exponentially and that may mean that the woman/wife/homemaker ends up making more than her husband. As long as a husband and wife are working as a team to provide for their children, and be there physically for them, why does it matter who’s bringing in how much? The important thing is preserving the family as a family unit. In my family, because I grew up without a father I learned to be very capable at making and fixing things and I have managed all of our renovation projects over the last 40 years. My husband has his own successful real estate investment and banking business, but does all of the cooking because he loves it. I was the stay at home mom but much more capable of fixing things so it would not be unusual for my husband to be standing in the kitchen in his apron and say something like “Honey the water pressure in the kitchen tap isn’t great. Can you have a look at it please?” As long as the children are loved and nourished, and you create a wonderful home, let the tasks fall where they may to who enjoys them and who is good at them.
Feel this to my core. Currently what my little family learning to navigate and embrace. And boy is there peace, joy and laughter in the home when I have to space to operate in my God given design, as does my husband. AND I get to create ontop of that? Dreamy (with a few kinks, but still dreamy!)
Can confirm that moms with more than 4 kids are the most chill. Sadly I don't have that many, but I know many, many families at our church with 4-7 kids. I feel like the best advice is to have at least one more than you can afford. And then have another.
I’ve definitely lived this! From 2020-2022 my coaching business hit the multiple 6 figure mark annually, my husband quit his job, and we traveled full-time in our RV around the US. It was lovely and wonderful…until it wasn’t. I didn’t really believe that men and women have separate roles and I thought we could interchange. It didn’t work, even as open-minded as we were about the whole thing.
The truth is that my husband (and many husbands of my high-earning online biz mama friends have shared) have a hard time not providing in a dynamic, financial way. There is something biological about going out and hunting for the family that is missed when mama is the provider and daddy is there as support.
Ultimately, it didn’t work for us and even the big bucks (and promise of a 7 figure business being right around the corner) wasn’t enough to keep pushing this direction.
I have lots to say on this topic (that perhaps I’ll share in later posts.) I don’t mean to discourage any mothers who dream of this. I’ve just been to the other side of this and it’s not what I thought it would be.
I love this, Peta! As a woman born in the late 1950s when the great majority of women on TV were portrayed as homemakers, and then having had three babies from 1988-1991 and being a stay at home mom, I have seen many shifts in how motherhood, fatherhood, and “providers“ are perceived, and unfortunately criticized. When I was a little girl, many stay-at-home moms were selling Avon, Tupperware, and Mary Kay cosmetics to earn income through having at-home get-togethers. The only difference I see from that to today, is that with the advancement of technology and social media, we have no idea what business is going to take off and grow exponentially and that may mean that the woman/wife/homemaker ends up making more than her husband. As long as a husband and wife are working as a team to provide for their children, and be there physically for them, why does it matter who’s bringing in how much? The important thing is preserving the family as a family unit. In my family, because I grew up without a father I learned to be very capable at making and fixing things and I have managed all of our renovation projects over the last 40 years. My husband has his own successful real estate investment and banking business, but does all of the cooking because he loves it. I was the stay at home mom but much more capable of fixing things so it would not be unusual for my husband to be standing in the kitchen in his apron and say something like “Honey the water pressure in the kitchen tap isn’t great. Can you have a look at it please?” As long as the children are loved and nourished, and you create a wonderful home, let the tasks fall where they may to who enjoys them and who is good at them.
Feel this to my core. Currently what my little family learning to navigate and embrace. And boy is there peace, joy and laughter in the home when I have to space to operate in my God given design, as does my husband. AND I get to create ontop of that? Dreamy (with a few kinks, but still dreamy!)
So dreamy xx
Can confirm that moms with more than 4 kids are the most chill. Sadly I don't have that many, but I know many, many families at our church with 4-7 kids. I feel like the best advice is to have at least one more than you can afford. And then have another.
I’ve definitely lived this! From 2020-2022 my coaching business hit the multiple 6 figure mark annually, my husband quit his job, and we traveled full-time in our RV around the US. It was lovely and wonderful…until it wasn’t. I didn’t really believe that men and women have separate roles and I thought we could interchange. It didn’t work, even as open-minded as we were about the whole thing.
The truth is that my husband (and many husbands of my high-earning online biz mama friends have shared) have a hard time not providing in a dynamic, financial way. There is something biological about going out and hunting for the family that is missed when mama is the provider and daddy is there as support.
Ultimately, it didn’t work for us and even the big bucks (and promise of a 7 figure business being right around the corner) wasn’t enough to keep pushing this direction.
I have lots to say on this topic (that perhaps I’ll share in later posts.) I don’t mean to discourage any mothers who dream of this. I’ve just been to the other side of this and it’s not what I thought it would be.